Nourishing Flourishing

(Psst: This post is a day late. Sorry! Internet issues at the hotel.)

Sooo. I’m heading to the city of brotherly (sisterly?) love for the Healthy Living Summit! I am actually writing this in the Denver International Airport after catching a bus at 6:30 this morning. And there are definitely a ton of birds flying around inside Gate A. Um… I guess it’s just our Colorado nature-lovin’ ways? Anyway, I wanted to take this opportunity to 1) give you a better idea of who I really am, because you might only get a quick glimpse from my blog and 2) Get real and confess something. Honesty is one of my all-time highest values, and I love the response to all the other Think This, Not That posts. So let me be legit transparent here and over-share. Again.

Last night, I was doing my usual last-minute-everything before travel. This meant:
- I washed two shirts I probably won’t even wear. In the bathtub. While in my underwear.
- I chose to make a batch of all three kinds of GF (vegan) doughballs to give out at the conference instead of packing or sleeping.
- I was totally confused that people were planning outfits. Clearly, I have no fashion sensibilities.
- I ended up just doing most of the things I needed to at 6am anyway. While in my underwear.

1 Batch Double Dark Chocolate

1 Batch Cinnamon Raisin Coconut

1 Batch Dark Chocolate Chip

Surprisingly, none of these things are the confession I had in mind. I know, right? What must I have in mind if not everything ending with, “and I apparently I never wear clothing”? But I have a feeling some of you might relate to this. Despite being a reasonably confident person who likes her identity, certain things can set me off. Traveling to conferences filled with strangers is one of them. As I got ready for the HLS…

I started to question if there were other things I should have done (in or out of my underwear):
- Lose weight
- Get a haircut
- Wax my arms (my family calls me Chewbaca, just to give you a point of reference…)
- Buy trendy clothes (I shop Goodwill. Yep.)
- Change my laugh (read: have surgery to prevent snorting)
- Cancel my trip altogether

These are the kind of anxious and insecure moments that take me back. Way back. To my ED history and The Crazies that sometimes resurface. I usually respond to these hiccups pretty well (see here and here), but I knew I needed to be uber-intentional about dealing with these irrational ideas last night. Travel + The Crazies = Stressball of Foolishness. This sudden stream of negative self-talk was rooted in my fears that I won’t measure up to what a healthy living blogger is “supposed” to be. Welp, good thing I get to define that for myself : )

So. Here’s what I did to realign my thinking with reality:
- You are healthy. If you are not confident about how you look, it’s a problem with your self-perception, not your body. You are strong, fit, and just how you need to be.
- People will probably be able to handle your split ends. You’re growing your hair out for a reason. Stop being vain.
- Meh. Didn’t have time, and while you might be physically more comfortable, it’s really not a big deal. If someone isn’t ready for this jelly…*shrug* So be it. It’s just part of being Spanish.
- Be yourself. That’s how you want new friends to know you. Goodwill and all.
- See above.
- Um…no. You’ll miss fun moment like this one from the Fitness and Health Bloggers Conference with friends like Anne and Alisa:

Ultimately, I got my head in the right place and stopped worrying about what sort of judgments and comparisons might arise. This community is based on mutual support and a shared mission to help people live healthier, flourishing lives anyway — why would I expect the opposite from anyone? Regardless, even if I did encounter this, I can’t control how people perceive me; I can only be myself.

(Warming my butt over a campfire and drinking coffee out of a Klean Kanteen cap. Ghetto fab.)

And myself is… well, (why lie?) a big doofus. A doofus who is going to be weighed down with doughballs, wearing outdated (ahem) “vintage” clothes that are wrinkled from my failed attempt to “roll” pack, snorting freely, and not hiding my hirsute, Mediterranean arms. So. Yep. Another Think This, Not That Real Life snapshot. Be yourself.

Just be sure to wear underwear. (Don’t worry, roomies — I packed clothes in addition to doughballs.)

Do you have to process through Crazies right before an event like this, or am I the only one?

If you’re at the Summit, please say HI! : )

So, you got an idea of what we did last week with my folks, but here is (finally!) an update on just the husband and I’s pseudo-anniversary trip. Our actual anniversary is in December… but when we were driving around in our rental car a few days ago, we heard Christmas music on the radio. Confused, we eventually put together that it was a “Christmas in July” theme, and we also got a really good laugh that it was our “half-anniversary.” This trip was partially planned under the guise of a very, very, very belated honeymoon, as our actual honeymoon was (intentionally) short and simple. (But that’s a story for another time.)

We were able to take this trip thanks to the generosity of my mother and father-in-law, who were so kind as to let us stay for free in their condo the entire time. You can imagine how grateful we are to them! Thank you Mom and Dad S! Here’s a glimpse of what we’ve been up to. (Also, if you would like a recommendation of where to stay in that area, shoot me an email or leave a comment. The place we stayed was AWESOME.)

[Show as slideshow]

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At the resort, I didn’t catch photos of the wildlife, but did try to savor getting to see such diversity up close. Everywhere we looked there were ducklings (have you ever seen a Muscovy duck? So unique!), turtles, lizards, egrets, ibises, and even giant iguanas. Such beauty! We lounged on the beach (couldn’t you tell from my 8000 photos of sunsets?), read books for fun (not academic works), and took lots of walks. Generally, we spent a lot of time away from technology, just basking in the wonder of nature and each moment we shared.

Things should be nearing normalcy this week; no more big trips anytime soon : )

Thank you for all your sweet encouragements to just enjoy the vacation; it can be hard for me to take a break from anything, including blogging, but with such support I took your advice to heart. <3

xo

Note: This isn’t meant to convince you to be vegetarian, judge you for not being vegetarian (seriously, would never do that), or anything along those lines. They’re just some ideas if you want to explore something different this week. No pressure, no preaching, no crazy. Just ideas, if you want them! If not, feel free to skip this post. No offense taken ; )

You want to know something hilarious? I don’t eat meat, and I don’t know when National Vegetarian Month is. Well, no, I do now — after I wrote a post about it last night. About 5 months early. Oops. Well, why waste a good post, right?! I thought it was too good to be true that National Celiac Awareness Month and National Veg Month would coincide. It might as well be National Nourishing Flourishing Month. Anywho, here are some good challenges for the remaining week of…Meatless May. Yes… Meatless May. Because that was totally my intention when I wrote this. Yes… (Oh! Just found out it’s National Vegetarian Week in the U.K. Maybe that’s where I went wrong…)

If you take me up on these little challenges, I would love to hear your reflections.(P.S. Still behind on comments…sorry! Catching up today hopefully.) If you don’t care, no worries. I just wanted to post this because I’ve gotten a lot of questions about vegetarianism lately, and I thought I could try to show that this lifestyle is not so strange after all. Knowledge is power, as they say (and by “they” I mean Schoolhouse Rock)… So if you feel up to it, use the last bit of this unofficial, non-national, self-imposed meatless month to explore something different.

Challenge #1: Don’t eat meat for the next week. As in, no seafood too. Straight-up, old school, 2 legit 2 quit no meat. Some of you may scoff at this, but if this seems easy, I would say, “And read all the labels on everything you consume, and ask lots of questions if you go out to eat, and put down that Guinness, and get rid of the marshmallows, gummy worms, jelly, worcestershire sauce, salad dressing, and cheese made with rennet.” Trickier than it seems initially. This little exercise might help you to better understand why your veg friend is a little paranoid about ingredients.

Challenge #2: Watch Earthlings, Food Inc., or Forks Over Knives. I’m actually taking myself up on this one! I never see movies in theatres (well, unless it’s the new Harry Potter, in which case we plan our trip to visit my family around its release date, and watch it with my dad. He’s a fan, to say the least. And considering we drive that far to celebrate with him, we just might be too…); it saves us a serious amount of cash, and at the same time strengthens our Patience muscle. So, I probably won’t be watching Forks Over Knives yet, despite being curious. I will be viewing Earthlings, though. And from what I hear…I’m going to have a hard time getting through it! But I don’t want to make excuses for choosing not to know something, so…here goes. As with all documentaries, I plan to take the information with a grain of salt; good research matters to me. Either way, I’ll make sure to post my thoughts afterwards.

Challenge #3: Start reading a vegetarian blog. No, this isn’t shameless self-promotion (though I am good at that). I just think exposing ourselves to other perspectives can be beneficial — not in an “I’m-now-becoming-vegetarian-too” way, though. Instead, it’s that vegetarianism suddenly doesn’t seem so foreign and one dimensional, and we learn to empathize with other’s convictions. (And hopefully realize they aren’t judging us constantly.) Plus, you save money when you cook vegetarian food! This is a great way to get recipes and ideas along those lines, especially when hosting vegetarian friends. My suggestions? Peas and Thank You, Daily Garnish, No Meat Athlete, and Edible Perspective.

Challenge #4: Have an open conversation with a vegetarian. It’s not about me trying to get you into a conversion-conversation. Not even remotely. If they get preachy or damning, politely change the topic (and accept our apologies for this person. Oy.). But as much as you can, try to understand where the person is coming from. I can tell you that when people really hear my position, and — though in the end they may respectfully disagree — make me feel as if they’ve genuinely given it the dignity of real consideration, it gives me such encouragement. And that encouragement comes not from the thought that I might have influenced their personal ethic or anything, it comes purely from feeling like I’m being treated as an intelligent peer, rather than a label or stereotype. Encourage your vegetarian friends by showing that you value their lifestyle, even if you might not fully agree with it.

What do you think? Would you try one of these to better understand the vegetarian lifestyle?

If you are already vegetarian and have done all these challenges, what would you add?

Remember how one of the things I was working on this summer was reconnecting with my creativity, and reading more for personal edification (rather than academic)? Well, this is a multifaceted adventure, with a variety of paths I plan to take. But I did end up in the library yesterday. Accidentally. And as I stumbled into a non-history-and-philology-related section (hm, had nearly forgotten those exist…), my whole world fell down, cracked, and opened to me once again.

We went on a walk without an intended destination. But the intrigue drew me to veer left; I simply couldn’t fight it any longer. The pull of old, worn books could ruin me one day — I lose all focus, wandering for literally hours at a time, sitting down in the middle of an aisle to peruse my latest treasure, running my fingers over the cold, musty pages with a deep and strange reverence. I feel like I am on sacred ground each time I enter a library; I step lightly, wide-eyed, touching every shelf’s hardcover spines with affection and wonder… All the while smiling like a fool.

Words and tales – and I am not ashamed to say it — have always been my dearest friends. Poems, prose, novels, dictionaries, even — these are my best teachers, empathizers, and enemies. Literature, very often, confronts and opposes us. It demands that we not look away, that we see the world from a different experience, that we become uncomfortable with the “us” we see traced throughout the story. It paints an accurate portrait of our worst (and best) selves. It highlights the disparity between these two identities we hold. It cultivates growth.

Certainly, then, you can understand why I am so eager to very purposefully set aside time each day to nourish myself through reading (and not a purely academic work, for once). When I look back on the poets, artists, and other distanced mentors who have shaped me, and how profound these changes have been, I set my excuses aside. I realize that there is no time like the present to prioritize this — this need to explore again the art that can sink into my being, and bring to fruition good things I never knew were sown within as seedlings. Literature gives me hope for myself, and humanity. It opens me to the hurt of those otherwise unknown to me. It sloughs off the callus of my jaded negativity and presumption. It points me toward the person I so achingly long to be. It calls me to keep working for that dream, with the weight of understanding with humility that I am incapable of fulfilling this ambition on my own. It is both inspiring, and humbling.

And don’t we need both in our life? Don’t we need to be keenly aware of our potential, and our error, to become more flourishing persons? I know that I do. So here is my first step. Consistency. Picking up a text at random is all fine and well, but I have found that for myself, some etching out of my day for only this endeavor is the most beneficial. Imagination is, interestingly enough, what grounds us in an acute awareness of reality. And I need that awakening.

I’m off to go fall madly in love with some ink, and all the humanity behind it. Here’s a selection from “Poetry,” by Marianne Moore, to get things rolling…

I, too, dislike it: there are things that are important beyond
all this fiddle.
Reading it, however, with a perfect contempt for it, one
discovers in
it after all, a place for the genuine.
Hands that can grasp, eyes
that can dilate, hair that can rise
if it must, these things are important not because a

high-sounding interpretation can be put upon them but because
they are
useful.

How has literature changed you? Do you wish you read more often?

What are you reading now?

This has been quite the week. I am constantly reminded of how blessed I am, and this is especially true in these past few days.

For one thing, we celebrated a milestone for the BFF Manfriend — the culmination of his hard work. His Master’s graduation marked both an ending and a beginning; while we are breathing out some of the exhaustion and busyness of these past two years, we are also preparing ourselves for even more — particularly as he embarks on his PhD work come fall. While a bit chaotic, these experiences have been, and continue to be, wonderful. Perhaps that’s how just about everything feels when you are with the right person. I absolutely love adventuring through life with this guy.

Congratulations, dearest! You truly earned it.

I know I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it agin: I have amazing parents. I have never known anyone who has encountered so many challenges, and still given so freely of themselves. My mother is the embodiment of grace, compassion, mercy, patience, faith, and wonder. This is the first Mother’s Day we’ve had since her mother, my grandma (G-Funk), passed away. While I miss her more than I can ever possibly express, I am so thankful that all her good qualities live on and shine through my mother.

Can you see their resemblance?

It’s clear in their love, too. (Happy Mother’s Day, lady. I love you.)

We are presently in Nebraska, for another, less expected celebration… The celebration of my husband’s grandmother’s life. She leaves behind her a rich, beautiful legacy — the character of her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren is just one of her many gifts to the world. And on that note, I will say I am so lucky to have a mother-in-law who is kind, welcoming, and thoughtful; she too carries on some of the best qualities of her mother.

Be sure to check out my guest post for Matt of The Athlete’s Plate! Maybe that makes up for yesterday…?

P.S. Again, I apologize for the lack of a post yesterday… With traveling, full schedules, and limited internet and time, I’m afraid there weren’t many options. Thanks for understanding and trust that posts will be back to normal soon ; )

What are you especially thankful for?

I was reflecting on how many people often remark to me that they can’t fathom my zeal for vegetables. A fair question; not everyone is madly enamored with cruciferous verdure. Even so, I think sometimes we have to learn to love the things that are best for us, that nourish our flourishing. That doesn’t mean begrudgingly shoving those brussels sprouts into your mouth, holding back your gag. Learning always necessitates allowing yourself to become open to something somewhat foreign, uncomfortable, and usually intimidating. Openness, of course, is liberating, whereas forcefulness and narrowness cause anxiety, frustration, and bitterness.

Confession: I used to hate running. I resented it. Why did I have to pound the pavement to be “healthy”? Why did I have to get up at 4:30 in the morning to do something I didn’t enjoy? Something that made me feel sick and exhausted? What was fun and nourishing about this?! But then, I stepped back. I realized that part of the reason it was no longer fun was because I felt obligated to do it. I may have wanted to run, yes — but I didn’t want to run simply because I felt I had no other options. When I had a brief one year stint in college on the cross country team (for the scholarship money, not because I was a good runner. Trust me, they were desperate.) I started to crumble physically and emotionally. I felt utterly depleted. I wasn’t running for the right reasons, I wasn’t paying attention to my body’s messages (“Hey, Katie, yeah…could you maybe, like, stop ingesting poison [gluten] constantly? Thanks, that would be super! xoxo, Yourself”), and frankly, I felt trapped. That is never, ever a way to live. Not only will you be frustrated, but you will never truly accomplish your goal in an enduring and fulfilling way.

Feeling Stuck.

I finally gave up running for a few months. I reflected on how I had come to despise something that had such potential to be fun. I recalled  the times and emotions from when I was out on the trail, focusing on nothing except my two feet and the beauty around me. iPod off. No coaches. No worries about my tempo, or calories, or anything. Just the dirt and my soles. I was fully alive. I was deeply grateful, sensing my breath, and my heart — the most fragile, but vital, parts of me. I felt simultaneously strong, empowered, free, and delicate, humbled, dependent… I was an active element of the unfathomably huge and complex reality around me, and also fully reliant upon it, and all its volatility. What a difficult and beautiful experience to articulate! Why did I only feel like that after I walked away from a promising career in Olympic running cross country and training plans?

I promise this relates to cruciferous vegetation. Promise. Relevance does not = obviousness.

Especially not with me. You know this.

I think this illustration works surprisingly well as an analogy for vegetable-loving, or any healthy change. If you try to demand something of your body, it probably is going to either 1) ignore you, or 2) get defensive, and make your life one of Dante’s Inferno circles because it’s angry. It doesn’t work. Of course, this is not an excuse to give up, and resign oneself to forever hating vegetables/exercise/whatever else you need for a flourishing life. Instead, it’s an impetus for creativity, experimentation, and growth. You can encourage yourself, rather than oppressing yourself. Your possibilities are boundless; there is no one definitive way that you must strictly follow to achieve your goal.

I no longer run much. And I am good with that. Once I allowed myself to not “need” to run in order to feel I was healthy (or perceived as healthy), all exercise became insanely enjoyable. Occasionally that included a jog, but more often it was one of the other activities I explored: strength training, yogaing, hiking, ellipticalling, stairclimbing, biking, etc. Getting the “OK” from myself to not have to run made me appreciate it so much more. Now I look at it as time to simply be, as I described above. But I wouldn’t feel that way unless I had changed my approach and opened myself to the possibility that running might not have to be what I assumed — competitive, draining, only worthwhile if done exactly like other runners. A few changes of perception were all I needed (oh, that and stopping the whole “eating poison constantly” thing…).

My parents told us that broccoli were dinosaur trees.

Um…

DINOSAUR TREES!!!

Guess who loved dinosaurs (like any little…girl….would)?! Guess who wanted to show how bad A she was even as a toddler?! Guess who is so excited even now at the mere thought of broccoli and devouring these small trees with her enormous herbivore mouth that she is throwing in a shameful but festive amount of exclamation marks?!?!!!! <— (It’s me, guys.  It’s me!!!)

Moral of the winding, long story: If you want to learn to love something, change your perspective! Approach it differently. Look at eating vegetables as an opportunity to explore something new. Don’t assume you will hate things you despised as a child. You have matured. Give yourself some credit! You don’t have to overcook your veggies to mush, like a parent might have. You don’t have to eat your greens only by eating salad after salad. You don’t have to eat what everyone else says you should (read: brussels sprouts). If you still hate them, go try something else! Why punish yourself? You can play. You can make mistakes. You can even now add wine to your food to play or cover up mistakes! So try something new. Maybe not even a new vegetable, but a new preparation method.

A great place to begin if you are trying to fall in love with vegetables is to roast them. Simply turn on your broiler, place cut up pieces of broccoli, or stalks of asparagus, or — gasp! — brussels sprouts, and drizzle some extra virgin olive oil on them, salt, and pop it in the oven. Watch closely — it will cook quickly. Give it a stir once, maybe (or not), and once you see the brown/char that you desire, chow down.

And if you hate it, no worries. There are lots of other things to try. Stay open. Stay fun. Adventure.

Tell me. What have you learned to love lately? Or what are you encouraging (not forcing) yourself to love?

Sometimes, we all have rough days. Sometimes, unnecessarily rough… There are situations in which one can handle things better. But I’m a slow learner… And apparently I like to make things more difficult than they need to be. You know the saying about taking lemons and turning them into lemonade? Well, occasionally I will just stand there staring at the lemons in horror, shouting, “WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?!” I overanalyze. Instead of saying, “Oh. Whoops! Looks like I might have made a little error there. Better do my best to fix it.”, I will just agonize over how it happened in the first place, and what this must indicate about my value as a person.

The other day, I lost my wallet. Yes. My wallet. As in, the thing that holds my money, identification, and life.

My bad.

Typically, when I do something foolish (i.e. when I’m negligent) like that, I overreact…

–> “You are a moron! Seriously, when are you going to grow up and be a real adult?!” (Never. Never is the answer… I hope.)

–> “This is so like you — ruining anything good. You had a great day and then you ended it by losing the most important thing you carry? Of course you did! Just like all the other good things you ruined in the past. [Insert stream of past failures.]”

–> “Wow. You have more zits than a teenager!” (Unrelated, my brain just likes to take advantage of any opportunity to take a jab at me.)

–> “Yes, that does make your butt look fat. And everything else, too.”

–> “You really can’t do anything right. Like — anything.”

I hardly need to go into more detail, because it’s all depressing, and ridiculous, and untrue, regardless. The main thing I want to highlight is how I (eventually) responded to these junky thoughts. I was so glad that in her guest post, Erin stated that it can be really helpful to personify your Crazies in some manner (her method is awesome). It made me feel a little less weird for doing this on a regular basis. However, instead of naming mine, I just talk to my Crazy like it’s a cheating scrub (whoa — flashback — TLC!) I’m breaking up with. I think it has something to do with listening to fem-power rock as a preteen… (’90s Alanis Morissette, anyone?)

I’ve been known to even sing at my Crazy when it gets all up in my grill with negativity. Yep. Does anyone else feel empowered by this? I like to employ songs like the one below, which I otherwise wouldn’t really listen to/acknowledge. It makes me laugh at myself, and then my thoughts start heading down a different stream. You know, the one with rationality. I’m able to step back, see the ludicrousness, and tell the thought to pack up and get gone…

And demand some (self-)Respect.

And let both my Crazy and my (logical) self know that life will go on despite my mistakes.

“You are a moron! Seriously, when are you going to grow up and be a real adult?!” –> No, I was just rushing, and need to be more careful next time. I know ancient Greek, yo. Pretty sure you can’t be a moron and learn another language. Chew on that, Crazy.

“This is so like you — ruining anything good. You had a great day and then you ended it by losing the most important thing you carry? Of course you did! Just like all the other good things you ruined in the past. [Insert stream of past failures.]” –> Um, all I did was lose a few things that are totally replaceable. Not the end of the world. Just the end of my bad driver’s license picture.

“Wow. You have more zits than a teenager!” –> I’ve been eating a lot of avocados lately. Worth it.

“Yes, that does make your butt look fat. And everything else, too.” –> I’m not fat. I work hard to be very healthy. And my butt doesn’t look bad — it looks big. Because it is. And I like it that way. Sucka.

“You really can’t do anything right. Like — anything.” –> I can’t believe I’m dignifying this with a response, Crazy. Look at my life! Awesome marriage = doing it right. Healthy = doing it right. Achieving challenging goals = doing it right. Wonderful friends = doing it right. Need I go on?

And if I’m still having trouble getting myself back in a realistic mindset, I’ll just listen to a song that I associate with success. Here is mine. I think you’ll understand why when you watch:

(Notice 1:15, 1:50, 2:00 for highlights — Thanks Caitlin for sharing on Twitter!)

Just wanted to give an example of what Think This, Not That can look like in action! : )

Before I post the next part of the Traveling Healthy series, I wanted to give a little preview or backstory to a couple of the forthcoming tips…

When you are hungry, sick, tired, food-limited (due to allergies or otherwise), and haven’t had a real meal in about 24 hours, this is what to do:

1. Don’t despair and drive yourself crazy.

2. Choose to be positive and make a game plan. (Consult a concierge. They’re nice, but be ready to be eyebrow-raised at, you with your messy hair, legging-attire, and desperation for cheap healthy food. Psh. Weirdo.)

3. Lace up. Head out, map and trolley info in hand.

4. Don’t forget that everything is an adventure! See challenges as opportunities.

6. Ask questions. Lots of questions. Be the Annoying Question Person. (Looking helpless is a bonus here.)

7. Grocery shop painfully slowly, but with careful attention to your hotel room’s capabilities.

8. Make friends in the check-out aisle. Talk philosophy with them. Maybe get an idea of the area you’re in now, since, you know…you have no clue.

9. Walk another few miles to another store. Remember that this is supposed to be Narnia.

10. Stock up further. Be sure you can carry what you buy.

11. Carry what you bought another few miles. (We’re up to 50 lbs now.)

12. Ask more (obvious) questions. Jump onto a few different modes of transportation.

13. Don’t flip out when a huge bag of your goods spills out all over the bus when the driver thinks it will be funny to make the out-of-towner idiot look like…an out-of-towner idiot. Instead, laugh and scramble for the coconut milk cans. And thank the kind people assisting you.

14. Awkwardly sneak back into the super classy hotel looking hot, sweaty, and like a bag lady.

15. Collapse on hotel room floor.

16. Rejoice in your awesomeness, epic success, and sweet bounty.

You #win.

Let me know your triumph over a tricky situation. The rest of this story is on its way…

You can check in on the last Mix Tape Post by clicking here. With all the traveling schtuff last week, I kind of had to skip it for a week or two. But don’t fear — your Sunday morning edition of The Nourishing Flourishing Times is here again. I hope you find some of these articles and posts to be useful and thought-provoking. Or just delicious.

Good Reads

Angela @ Oh She Glows’ amazing post called “Lessons on Self-Love“, and another on recovering from negative thought-patterns and actions. Both are honest, thoughtful, practical, and encouraging.

Gena @ Choosing Raw’s analysis and response to a popular article describing eight “types” of disordered eating personalities.

This article on how those little PLU stickers on your produce can tell you whether your food is genetically modified or not.

This rocking article about parents, kids, and how we’re totally destroying our children, pretty much. (Ok, a little dramatic — but I was so grateful to see someone standing up about this!) Read the title and tell me you don’t agree.

This was one of my favorite posts to date, most likely because I feel like it is the most true-to-myself. I mess up. But I’m learning. It sounds like you guys are human too. So if you missed it, have a quick glance.

Good Eats

Cinnamon (Un) Sugar Dessert Hummus –  I tried this on my toast this morning and almost fainted. And then I tried it on apple slices and I did faint. (Again, with the dramatics…)

Sloppy Joe Lentil Posers – We found out that these are even better the next day. I didn’t really think that was possible. We will be eating these once a week now. Quite seriously.

Double Dark Chocolate Doughballs – Need I say more? Ok. I will: gluten-free, vegan, 15 minutes. Snap.

Mama Pea’s Not-Animal Crackers – These look ridiculously awesome. And it’s not just because they’re in the shape of vegetables. (They are GF and vegan too!)

(The other, ha) Katie’s No Makeup Smoothie — No makeup? Check. I’m in. Bonus: a B12 surprise. Bam! I’m drooling.

I promise, my dad was closer than he appears. And my face is probably not that wide. A bad angle on a great moment : )

Good Times

My parents are visiting! I wish I could express how happy this makes me.

Maybe the photo helps in conveying this.

<3

Any highlights from your week?

There are occasionally moments when I just verge on falling apart. In our family, we call this The Breaking Point.

We all have different “triggers,” if you will, which set a Breaking Point off. Mine tend to be over-exhaustion, sickness, hunger or eating the wrong foods, and bitter cold. (Oh, and not being in control of everything — that too…) I have gotten so, so, so much better at dealing with this. But ultimately, TBP is just a part of the human experience. Sometimes we lose our cool. Sometimes it really is a perfect storm of unfortunate events. Sometimes, we just need to have a few minutes to process that. And sometimes, processing = a Breaking Point.

In such a case, I used to let myself spiral into a crazyhole of victimization and catastrophizing, but now I see that it gets me absolutely n o w h e r e . I have learned to empathize with the part of myself that wants to have a freakout session whenever my hour/day/life might not go as I desire. I validate my emotions by first acknowledging, “This really is not fun. It’s disappointing. I can be upset — it’s ok to be upset.”

Then after validating myself, I ask: “So. What are you going to do about it?” In a conversation with two people, when Person 1 recognizes and affirms Person 2′s (perhaps unreasonable) emotions, Person 2 usually calms down because their reaction is empathized with. Understanding can go a long way. Person 2 and Person 1 can join (more reasonable) forces to reassess the situation and move forward.

Replace “Person” with “Self.” Do you pick up what I’m throwin’ down?

After I sensed the beginnings of a BP on the trip, I empathized with and validated the part of myself that was feeling guilty about not packing and preparing better for my dietary needs, resentful that I didn’t have more options, exhausted, sick, and stressed. “Yes, this is definitely not ideal, is it Self?” No. It’s not. “Ok. Welp. Shall we keep wallowing or…?”

I opted out of wallowing. It would have been boring. So… I grabbed my day and trip and sanity back. I can make the best of things. I can face challenges. I can be an adventurer. This could be an opportunity, if I have the right attitude. I needed to make my turn-around decision concrete. So. I did.

In case you can’t read my frantic writing, it says,
“I choose to have a good day — regardless of my mistakes
regardless of others’ mistakes
regardless of frustrations
regardless of exhaustion
regardless of health
regardless of how I ‘feel’ –
I choose to have a good day.
Not a perfect or delusional day — but a day with goodness nonetheless.”

I don’t mean to imply that every day is good and it’s simply a matter of our perception, or that we’re supposed to fake it as if we’re having the best day ever. When I lost two of the most important people in my life this year, it wasn’t a good day. But — each day has some little seed of goodness in it, which sprouts through even the darkest dirt. It doesn’t negate the difficulty or pain of a hard day; it simply gives us hope and guides us toward a broader perspective. Goodness is at work, springing flowers from manure… It finds a way to pierce through.

I keep returning to this little note, even now that I’m home. I need to constantly remind myself that I do, indeed, have a choice about how I approach my day, and life; I can make the best of it. Stay tuned for more on that… ; )

Do you ever write yourself notes to turn your thinking around?

How do you find goodness in hard situations?